ok y’all

how do i ask a boy out

roses are red

violets are blue

guess what, my bed

has room for twoOH MY GOD NO

twinkle twinkle little star

we can do it in a carSTOP IT

row, row, row your boat

gently down the stream

merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily

i can make you screamI feel like the last one is verging dangerously into serial killer territory

Let me know when you get it

Yet translating the equation into a traditional computer language would force us to choose one of the old prophets

Applying of the Pythagorean Theorem in solving problems.

Figure 1, 2:Pythagorean Theorem and a visual proof of the Pythagorean theorem.

Figure 3:Applying the Pythagorean theorem to prove empirically (without measuring or superimposing any shape on the other one) thatArea ofcurvilinear shape A=Area ofThe curvilinear shape (A) is equidecomposable to 2 squares and the cross-shaped figure (B) to a larger square. We can then demonstrate thanks to the Pythagorean theorem that they are of the same area, as shown in the figure below. During this operation no pieces are superimposed nor placed side by side!cross-shaped figure B -Soultion:

Figure 4:Right Triangles in daily life - In mathematics, the Pythagorean theorem or Pythagoras’s theorem, is a relation in Euclidean geometry among the three sides of a right triangle. It states that the square of the hypotenuse (the side opposite the right angle) is equal to the sum of the squares of the other two sides. (Photo by Andrea Bricco, Food Stylist Diana Perrin)

Figure 5:Unit circle, a unit circleis a circle with a radius of one. Frequently, especially in trigonometry, the unit circle is the circle of radius one centered at the origin (0, 0) in the Cartesian coordinate system in the Euclidean plane. The unit circle is often denotedS^{1}; the generalization to higher dimensions is the unit sphere. If (x,y) is a point on the unit circle, then |x| and |y| are the lengths of the legs of a right triangle whose hypotenuse has length 1. Thus, by the Pythagorean theorem,xandysatisfy the equation: X^2 + Y^2 = 1.

Image:Shared at visual proof of Pythagorean theorem on Wikipedia - The Puzzles on Archimedes-lab.org - The Sine and Cosine.

### "If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us."

### Haiku: Physicists

Self-aware atoms

Delve deeper into themselves,

Try to find meaning.

so here’s a fun story about this movie. guess who loves this movie? me! i do! i love this movie. i love this movie so much that when i was in the 7th grade and i saw “first wives club 2” on pay per view i was like: HELL YEAH!! FIRST WIVES CLUB

TWO!!NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS ASEQUEL!!!here’s the synopsis for first wives club 2:

disgruntled first wives take their ex-husbands’ new lovers under their wing.

sounds great, right? awesome viewing material for a precocious 11-year-old.

so i buy this movie, and like, three minutes into it i’m starting to feel suspicious?? like it’s really low quality and my girls are nowhere in sight?? how come none of the first wives are the same?? how come they’re alone in a bedroom with mood lighting?? why is she taking off her shirt?? why are they both taking off their shirts?? WHY ARE THEY—

here’s what i did not know about first wives club 2:

- it is a lesbian porno of no relation to the beloved 1996 classic.
so of course i, horrified that i’ve accidentally bought porn on my family’s account (and in that state of panic that kids work themselves into whenever anything regarding sex is mentioned), quickly shut off the TV and go upstairs and watch an episode of veggie tales to like, cleanse my soul and apologize to jesus, and that’s that.

EXCEPT, OF COURSE:

- you have to pay for pay per view.
so the end of the month comes and i have completely put this incident out of my mind, haha, i accidentally bought porn, how funny, TELL NO ONE. right? and i’m sitting at a nice dinner with my mother, my stepfather, and my very religious aunt deb, and we’re just talking about farm things, whatever, when suddenly my mother puts her fork down and says, “okay, there’s something we need to discuss. as a family.”

- AS A FAMILY.
and i’m like, running through a list of people i know who could conceivably be dead, and fantasizing about my mother announcing that she’s going to buy me My Own Computer Just Because U Earned It Kiddo, and she pulls out a piece of paper that says DIRECTV across the top. and i’m like: OH NO.

"i received the tv bill today," my mother said, and i was like, shoveling potatoes into my mouth as fast as i could because i knew that when i went to PORN PRISON they weren’t going to feed me this kind of quality starch. "does anybody want to tell me who purchased the pornography?"

as a reminder, a quick table survey:

- my mother, surprised and disappointed by the porn bill (innocent)
- my stepfather, a grumbly old cowboy who just wants to sing along to kenny chesney and watch
the hunt for red october(innocent)- my aunt deb, a super religious catholic whose best friend is a nun named Sister Placid (innocent)
- me, the 11-year-old with a mouthful of potatoes who definitely purchased the lesbian pornography
silence.

my mother said, “i’m not going to ask again.”

silence.

my aunt looked at my stepdad. my stepdad looked at my aunt. NOBODY LOOKED AT ME, THE 11-YEAR-OLD WITH A MOUTHFUL OF POTATOES WHO DEFINITELY PURCHASED THE LESBIAN PORNOGRAPHY.

my mother shook her head and put the bill down. “this was incredibly inappropriate,” she said. “skip, deb, whoever. buy that shit on your own time. i’m not paying for it. what if molly had seen it?”

- WHAT IF MOLLY HAD SEEN IT?
"don’t expose my kid to that crap."

- DON’T
- EXPOSE
- MY KID
- TO THAT CRAP
"if you want to watch porn, fine, but do it in private and don’t expect me to pay for it. i can’t believe one of you did that in the living room."

- I CAN’T BELIEVE ONE OF YOU DID THAT
- IN THE
LIVING ROOM

but molly, why didn’t you own up to it and explain that it was an accident?

- are you fucking kidding
- i did not want to go to porn prison
the fun conclusion to this story is that i never owned up to it, which means that there are 3 people in the world who have not solved the mystery of the lesbian porn. a quick survey:

- my mother, who lives every day wondering whose porn she paid for
- my stepfather, who probably wishes he knew less about his wife’s sister’s porn preferences
- my aunt, who probably wishes she knew less about her sister’s husband’s porn preferences

but molly, why don’t you own up to it now, with the safety of time and distance and the knowledge that porn prison isn’t real?

- are you fucking kidding
- this is the best thing i’ve ever done

Some brain fitness(clic). When you’re done with them. try the “Famous Math Problems" fromWolframAlpha.com, and then, if you feel strong, go to this wikipedia entry:List of unsolved problems in mathematics. Good luck!

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